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BakoMom
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Time Outs

I have started giving time outs to my daughter who is nearly 18 months old.  It started this past weekend.  She was beating my very patient dog, Princess Frankie, over and over again with her bald dolly.  I kept saying no and redirecting her.  To no avail, she continually made her way back to beating the dog.  Poor dog and dolly.  I thought now is good as any to start time outs.  I sat her on the floor right there at the point of impact.  Told her no, and informed her she as on a time-out.  She cried and cried.  Of course, my heart was breaking.  After a short moment in time, her time-out was over.    The dog hasn't been beaten since.  I'm sure it won't be the last however. 

So, I was wondering does anyone else use time-outs?  How should I do use time-outs with an 18 month old?

 

Next post idea.... Mommy Time Outs! :)  Much needed!

 

Posted in the Family & Home interest group.
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posted by BakoMom on Thursday, May 15, 2008 at 09:12 PM
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posted by kevinmorrison on May 16, 2008 at 06:56 AM

I never thought I would be a believer in time-outs before I had children.  When I was a kid, my mom's wooden spoon was pretty effective.  I have never hit my kids with something and don't see a time when I will.  Removing them from the problem activity, usually makes a point.

As far as how to use timeouts, I've heard that a minute per year of age is appropriate enough to get your point across.  So a minute and a half for your daughter probably doesn't sound like much, but that's pretty big when you're 18 months.

She's not quite old enough for this yet, but when my kids are continually misbehaving in one activity, I take away another unrelated activity that they like.  So now their actions have extended consequences beyond the immediate situation.  A form of "grounding" I guess, the next level beyond time-out.  That sticks in their head pretty well.

posted by DiVerL on May 16, 2008 at 09:55 AM

Very young children do not really understand the concept of right and wrong. For them, what is "good" is what they like and what is "bad" is what they don't like.  You did good.  Redirection is key and you end up doing it OVER and OVER, and over again....ahhhhh. 

Hey this is the age when I got ABC flash cards and taught my oldest one her alphabet by sight.  Start off with the Capital Letters and do just a few a day, then point to letters on, say, cereal boxes or signs to get her to see letters are everywhere.  By the time she was 4 she could read the signs above the aisles at Albertsons too.   I put a note in her lunch the first day of Kindergarten that said, I love you and have a great day. It's one of the BEST things I've EVER done. Just a tip...hope it works

posted by srfbluemama on May 16, 2008 at 10:36 AM

We do timeouts with my son (our daughter is still too young to understand, I think). We started them around the time he turned 2, I think. We do a minute for each year old (he's up to 2:30 right now, since he's turning 3 really soon). They seem to work pretty well for us. He has a certain area of the house (a doorway off of the living room) where he has to stand for the timeout. It's out of the way, but still in our sight. He's required to come talk to us about it after it's over too: What did you get a timeout for? Do you need to apologize to anyone? etc.


posted by HeatherIjames on May 16, 2008 at 10:02 PM

i am a FIRM believer in mommy time outs.  i actually lock myself in my room and ethan's antics are powerless against that locked door!  we still use time outs and he's going on five!  i think we started around 18 months.  started in his playpen (because he couldn't figure out how to climb out), then his bedroom, then a corner in the house, now it's face in the corner. 

and if you felt bad about the time out, wait until you decide to spank (if you decide to spank) but dear me, i think every child will drive a parent to spank!

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