Our niece is now scheduled for transplant surgery at 1 a.m.  The donor is a 4 year old. Please keep both families in your thoughts and prayers.  Also, our niece's blood pressure is high - this needs to be under control.

This doesn't seem real. We've needed this for so long.  In the midst of finding out information about the transplant, donor, etc., everyone's head swims.  The waiting, the anticipation, the thinking about the body accepting the new organ, . . . emotions are on overdrive.

Amazing.  Again, thank you, God, for keeping our niece alive.

My niece is getting a kidney - tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's the story?  Lupus runs in the family.  It's evil.  Family members have transplants, joint replacements, and quite a few have passed away. 

My niece was diagnosed when she was in her teens.  She's been on dialysis for a long time now.  Family members volunteered their kidneys, but no one was a good candidate for being a donor.  My niece has often been too sick to undergo the transplant surgery which has complicated the process beyond explanation.  So, today, the family received a call from U.C.L.A. - they have a perfect match for my niece!  And right now my niece is relatively healthy - healthy enough to have the surgery.  Today is THE DAY!  As soon as the family arrives, my niece will be rushed in and prepped.  Surgery should take place in a couple of hours!!!!!

I am so thankful.  I am thankful for the donor family.  I am thankful that my niece will be able to finish college now.  I am thankful she will live the life she is destined to live.  There really are no words to express the gratitude our entire family feels.

Yay, God!

larger view larger view larger view larger view larger view

The kiddo loves her My Gym class, but sometimes she has her own plans.  After setting up the orange cones, she grabbed one and started yelling, "Brothers and sisters, ladies and gentlemen, it's time for a show!"  Meanwhile the teacher was trying to gather up the children for circle time. 

That's my kid.  She just wants to do her own thing.

We've been house bound for  a couple of days now.  The kiddo and I both have cabin fever, but I am happy to say that after much rest and a good start on the antibiotics, she is almost back to her normal self. It amazes me that after 24 hours of meds, she perked up so quickly.  And then after a 3 hour nap yesterday and sleeping in till 8:30 this morning (yes, that  is sleeping in; anything after 7 is considered sleeping in), she was feeling off the charts better. 

I'll still have her take a nap tomorrow, and we are keeping her home one more day.  Books, movies, games, puzzles, play dough - that should keep us occupied.

I am so thankful she's getting better. 

taken the kiddo to the doctor.  Of course, I say this in hindsight of today's events.  A couple of days ago the kiddo complained of a sore throat.  She had a bit of a dry cough and quickly developed a raspy voice.  I chalked it all up to allergies.  Then last night, fever hits, not high, but still a clear fever.  She was lethargic all day today.  Then about 5:00, she starts feeling better.  She got up off the sofa and played, and I was so pleased to see she was feeling better.  I think it's over.  Then around 7:00 I hear, "I itch, Mommy."  Her arms are bright red and as rough as sand paper.  The same rash is blossoming on her torso.  It's on her thighs and moving southward.  I wish I would have taken her to the doctor.

Why do symptoms present themselves so slowly sometimes?

Guess what I'm doing at 8:00 a.m. on the dot tomorrow? 

larger view larger view

For three summers now, the kiddo has taken swim lessons.  As of Tuesday, she has earned the privilege of using the entire pool!  That's a big accomplishment for a not quite 4 year old.

Of course she must be supervised. 

However, without either the kiddo or I knowing it, the instructor gave her a safety test.  And then she announced, "Well Kiddo, you have now earned rights to the whole pool!  You can swim anywhere you want."  The kiddo was so pleased.

Now don't picture a preschooler with a perfect freestyle stroke.  She's not near that.  What she does know how to do is swim without panicking, get her breath when she needs, and safely swim the length of the pool.  She knows the water will hold her up.

So the kiddo works on her freestyle stroke, and she also works on the butterfly.  Yeah, the butterfly.  I was in shock when her instructor started her on this.  But when you think about it, the butterfly is technically the easiest;  it's just more exhausting than the others. At almost 4 years of age, the kiddo has the energy, for sure!  So, the butterfly is no big deal to her like it is to me.  Makes sense.

I would be proud of the kiddo whether she was a natural fish or not, but it is so much fun to watch her swim simply because she enjoys it so much.

Kiddo:  Hey Mom, that park is the same color as my park.

Me:  The same color as your park?  (Wondering how she got a park and what color it was)

Kiddo: (matter of factly) Yeah, my park.  It's green.

Me:  Oh, yes, parks are green.

--------------------------------

Kiddo:  There are two Pauls.

Me: Huh?

Kiddo:  My friend, Paul, and L's daddy is Paul.

Me:  That's right, honey.  L sure liked you.  (L was two and recently passed away in a tragic accident.)

Kiddo:  L was nice.  I didn't get to marry him 'cause he died.  That's a bummer, Mommy.

Me:  Yes, it is, sweetie. 

____________________

 Kiddo:  I need to buckle my baby in.

Me:  I'm not stopping to buckle the baby in.  Just hold on to her tightly.  (What am I teaching her?)

larger view larger view

We went to a spray park today - Madison Grove spray park.  It's on Norris near Calloway. Loved it.  Playground is fun and clean, clean, clean (extra points for that in my book).  Spray park is simple, yet the kids loved it.  One of the spray toys is a mister which I enjoyed.  This park gets my approval!

Every morning the kiddo either wakes up singing or she yells, "Daaaaaaaaaadddddddyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!"&nb sp; When I walk into her room, she unfailingly asks, "Where's Daddy?"  I tell her that he is at work, and then her next question is "What are we doing the other day?"  (Translated:  What are we doing today?)  This makes me laugh.  She must know if we are going anywhere or if anyone is coming over.  What really get me is when she lays out a plan for us, and she uses her hands to emphasize the reason and importance behind her words. This is how each day begins.  I wonder when this routine will change? (not that I want it to - I find her quite entertaining)

larger view

I bought my hubby the Steven Curtis Chapman cd that has the Cinderella song on it for our 3rd Family Day (3 years since we adopted our daughter).  We were listening to the song, laughing and crying, as SCC sung about dancing with his little Cinderella while he has the chance, before time passes and she's all grown up and finding her another prince.

We thought of our little girl, and how she loves to twirl, how she loves to wear dresses that are good for twirling.  We laughed at our pretend play - the kiddo lets a shoe fall off, and one of us must pick it up and slip it on her foot to see if it fits;  of course it fits, and so we proceed to get married.  We giggled while remembering (and somewhat re-enacting ourselves) how the kiddo comes to us and asks, "Do you like my dress?"  And according the script we must pretend to rip her dress as we whine and yell, "Mother!  That's my sash!  And those are my beads!"  Then the kiddo turns around, runs away, throws herself on the ground and turns on the fake tears.  Occasionally a fairy godmother shows up to save the day.

These dramas are played out several times a day.  And sometimes I let out an exasperated sigh at the thought of replaying the scene.  But then I capture my thoughts and attitude and remember that I have this time with her only for a short while.

As SCC sings, we don't want to miss one dance.

This has nothing to do with raising kids except for the fact that I do want my daughter to taste our local fish.  I've lived here most of my life, and when I was younger I used to fish with my dad.  But I don't want to fish right now;  I just want to eat the fish, rainbow trout that is. (Not that anyone can fish in the Kern right now -have you seen how muddy it is?- so sad!)

Anyone know of a restaurant here in Bakersfield that serves Rainbow Trout?

larger view larger view

My little sis just graduated from the Bethel School of Worship in Redding, CA.  We took a quick trip up there for the grad ceremony.  Another lovely lady we know and love also went with my sis.  After the graduation celebration, the ladies were happy bugs, and I took a pic to capture the moment.

And while we were staying at the hotel, the kiddo got to jump on the bed.  She has learned that jumping on the bed in only allowed in hotels, and she  takes full advantage of her hotel stays.  ( We did not teach her that.)

So that is our recent excitement.  Life is good.

larger view

A few months ago we participated in the Relay for Life with some dear friends.  For those of you who don't know, each team is assigned a campsite on the C.S.U.B. soccer fields.  As we brainstormed what our team would need to take, my first question was "What is the toilet situation out there?"  I soon learned that the American Cancer Society supplied outhouses for all the participants.   Well, that just wasn't going to do for out preschooler.  I was not going to have her use an outhouse - it disgusts me enough when I have to use one.  I could not imagine my being in that 2 x 2 foul smelling area trying to hang onto my daughter so she wouldn't fall down into the sewage. 

My brilliant friend, Superha (here on RB) had a simple solution to my potty problem:  Potty on the Go by Fisher Price.  She kept hers at the campsite for the weekend, and all the kids used it.  I'd never seen it before the Relay weekend, but I had to have one.  This thing is beautiful.  It is a life saver.  It is one of the greatest inventions. 

This little potty has three sturdy legs which fold up under the seat for storage, and it comes with a neat carrying case.  A bag fits between the seat and the potty base for catching the wee wee and poo poo, and an absorbent pad is placed at the bottom of the bag to prevent free flowing urine.  When the child is finished doing the duty, the bag can easily be tied and thrown away.  (When we're on the road, and there is no trash can around, I double or triple the bag, and then I toss it later.)

So this last weekend, the hubby, kiddo and I traveled to Redding.  I've always preferred taking I-5, but the 99 has more pit stops.  However, with Potty on the Go, we didn't have to worry if there was  a decent pit stop.  In fact, I've pulled over to the side of the road, whipped out the Potty, and had the kiddo pee right there.  (It sure beats an accident in the car seat!)  So, this trip, it was I-5 all the way.  The POTG makes traveling so much easier.

Also, I've used the POTG in the Target parking lot.  We had just returned to our van, unloaded the bags, and the kiddo yells, "I need to go weeeeeeee!!!!!"  I had just asked her inside the store if she needed to go.  I was trying to get home in time for I don't remember what, but I was in a hurry.  So instead of going back into the store, I simply took out the POTG.  So simple.  Everyone was happy. 

And what else is great about POTG?  It's only $20.  Yeah.  An absolutely amazing invention such as this is so cheap.  Gotta love it.

If you take a look at the potty, you'll see that there are special bags  and pads that come with it.  Truth be told, those are not necessary.  A good ol' Target or Vons bag will do, and instead of a pad, stuff a couple of paper towels in it to soak up the pee.  There is no need to special order anything for this potty.

I highly, highly, highly recommend the Potty on the Go if you travel with a toddler/preschooler or you are repulsed by many public restrooms like I am, and you'd rather have your child pee on a bush than use a filthy toilet.

The kiddo has a solution to everything.

Yesterday we had some friends over for dinner.  They have a little boy whom the kiddo adores, and so she was excited that he was coming over.  About an hour before their arrival time, the kiddo started asking every minute, "Are they coming?  Will they be here soon?"  Over and over and over - the same questions.  Ugh.  But I just assured her that they would arrive soon like we'd planned. 

Finally the kiddo just gave up and came up with a new plan for us. She threw up her hands and announced, "Let's put our dinner in the car and take it over to M----'s house!  That's a good idea, yeah?"

We laughed. 

So the kiddo is comin' up with stuff that stumps us at times.  She must see my jaw drop when she dishes out a good one.  Tonight she wanted me to stop cleaning  the kitchen and go with her to the bathroom.  This is a recap of our conversation:

Me:  Honey, why don't you go potty before we get you ready for night-night?

Kiddo:  I want you to come with me.

Me: Sweetie, I'm in the middle of cleaning up the kitchen.  You can go by yourself (which she does all the time), and I'll be here in the kitchen.  I'm not far away.

Kiddo:  But I want you.  I can't go by myself.

Me:  You go by yourself all the time.  Now go potty so you can get ready for bed.

Kiddo: (whining)  Nooooooo.  Those aren't  MY RULES.  You have to come with me.

Me:  What rules?

Kiddo:  My rules.  My rules say I can't go by myself.

Me:  Who taught you about rules?  Who else has rules?

Kiddo:  Eloise.  (This is her imaginary friend.)

Me:  I'm going to have to talk to Eloise.

So I don't know where this "rules" thing came from.  Maybe she invented it on her own.  She has been trying new tactics.  I tell you, the kiddo changes her strategy for getting what she wants all the time, and I'm constantly having to make adjustments.  She certainly keeps me on my toes.  And she keeps me laughing.

Several people who know we are adopting again have recently inquired about where we are in the process.  We appreciate the love and support friends and family offer as we wait for what seems like forever.   We appreciate the prayers on our behalf and our child's behalf.  And questions are okay.  We don't mind answering questions, but what is bothersome is some of the comments we hear like "I don't understand why the Chinese government can't move faster," or "You'd think the Chinese would want to find homes for those children," or "Why do the Chinese have to make it so difficult and complicated."  When these comments are made, we hear presumptuous blame being put on our daughter's birth country, blame that they do not deserve.  It is insensitive at best.  So, I thought I might clear a few things up for those who might inquire as to why the wait time has increased.

Before I share my understanding of what is happening, let me say that there is no one specific reason for the increased wait time. 

First, the number of adoptive parent applicants has increased beyond expectation.  In comparison to other international adoption programs, China has proved to be more reliable.  The process is relatively smooth.  The children are taken care of and healthy.  Overall, China has a wonderful social welfare system.  Hence, many adoptive families are choosing to adopt from China, so the wait has become longer.

And yes, there are many children in China needing to be adopted, but they are not paper ready.  International law requires a child have a birth certificate.  This is not just Chinese law.  And just like in the U.S., processing paperwork requires money.  For every child in a Chinese social welfare institute (SWI), the SWI must pay $300 for the child's birth certificate.  SWI's do not have $300/child.   Also, not all SWI's are legally set up for their children to be adopted.  There is a legal process that must be followed- kind of sounds like the U.S., yes?  The Chinese and others are around the world are working hard to get these SWI's certified and get birth certificates for the children.

Another factor is the increase in domestic adoption in China.  This is a good thing!  Laws are changing.  Many people assume that a one child policy exists for all of China - not true!  In some areas, Chinese families are being encouraged to adopt children from the SWI's. 

 There is also speculation that the Olympics being hosted in Beijing has slowed things down.  I do not know how true this is.  We will see if processing speeds up after August.

I'm not even sure how to end this.  I do know that my hubby and I are somewhat tired of hearing the critical remarks regarding China.  It gets old, and what sounds like arrogance behind the judgments gets old.  But what I do know is that we will continue to try to help people understand the international adoption process, and we will quickly admit that we do not understand it all. 

In December we're taking another trip to Disneyland.  We can't get enough, and this time we're going with the kiddo's prince (they got "married" a couple of months ago). 

Now the Prince's mom is very efficient, thinks of everything ahead of time, and has a plan to avert any possible mishap.  Last time she took her boys to Disneyland (her sister and kids went, too), she ordered brightly colored matching tie dyed t-shirts for all the kids so she could easily spot them in a large crowd.  I appreciate the thought and planning she put into the hippie shirts idea, but when we go in December, our kiddo isn't wearing a shirt that competes with the neon factor of a county worker's uniform.

So, I started thinking about what I can do to keep our kiddo safe.  You see, when we've gone to D-land before, the kiddo rode in the stroller most of the time. Hence, we didn't have to worry about her running off.  And I know she's a smart kid, and she probably wouldn't do anything like that; but a kid is a kid, and sometimes there is a character, a ride, a balloon, a something-so-appealing-it-can't-be-resisted, and a child goes after it without a second thought of checking with mom or dad. 

With all this in mind, I was beyond delighted when a friend sent me this link for Safety Tats.  What a simple yet brilliant idea!  The safety tattoos are like the character ones kids wear now, but the tattoo is that of the parent's cell phone number and a message that says, "If Lost, Please Call . . .."   I do wonder about how long it will last (company states the tattoos last 1-5 days), but I figure for $20, it's worth a shot.  My other option is to use a permanent marker on the kiddo or on her clothes.  I liked the tattoo idea better.