This is one of my BIGGEST pet peeves! The exact same scenario you described happened to my husband and I a few years ago when we went to see that World Trade Center movie with Nicolas Cage. It was the saddest thing! And we went to see The Dark Knight Friday night and saw another small child in there with parents. We didn't hear any crying but that movie really scared the bajeesus outta me so I can't imagine a child of 6 or 7 in there!!!!!

Bravo! I totally agree. Not that I really get to go to movies that much anymore, but it always annoyed me in the past when I saw small children in R movies. I always wanted to go smack the parents. If you really want to see a movie and you can't find a sitter, wait until it comes out on video and watch it after the kids go to bed. That's what we do.

And the poor little girl... That just makes me so sad that her parents would A) take her to that movie, and B) not take her out of there when she was so scared. :(

I completely agree. I have a son who loves Batman but he's only 6. My husband and I went to see Dark Knight on Wednesday and we absolutely refused to take him to see the movie, regardless of how much he cried.  One of my family members wanted us to take him to see the movie and yet again I refused. We hadn't seen much of the previews. When we went to get the kids from the sitter's I told them I was glad we didn't take our oldest. I told them why we were glad that we didn't take him.

Well luckily I don't have to defend myself here :) We didn't even take our son to see Indiana Jones, no matter how much he begged, because we just weren't sure - heck we're still holding off on Pirates of the Carribean.  I have been faced with this situation twice. Once was years ago, in a violent movie, where the little girl (probably 5) was crying in the movie theater ... so pissed me off. Just this year we saw another movie that had some sexual content that I thought kids should definitely not be seeing,, I had to close my eyes during that part because I personally was uncomfortable watching it with two young children (maybe 6 and 8) sitting right in front of me. Kids have the rest of their lives to do adult things, I don't understand why some parents feel the need to start all this at such a young age!

I don't think they are giving a second thought to their children's age.  I don't think they are giving much thought beyond themselves in this situation...  which is where the need for growing up themselves becomes apparent.  The frustration multiplies for me, since right now I am two years into a four-year process of jumping through hoops trying to prove I am a qualified parent to adopt, while some people only had to...  well, you know.  And even Monkeys can do that.

I can't defend the parents selfish actions in any case such as this!  What is worse, is that the movie theatre manager wouldn't stand behind (or they don't have an attorney) to stand behind and kick the parents out with this terrified child!  I suppose the children who are allowed to witness this violence thanks to the movie theatre and their lack of back-bone, are supposed to just watch and learn - when they return as angry young adults, teens with guns....and replay the violence that they have witnessed in the movies and learned (thanks to their irresponsible parents) WHO will accept the blame then?  It won't be the parents - guaranteed!  It won't be the movie theatre, or the movie industry - for SURE!  

Unfortunately, these parents don't see that their child will remember this violence for the rest of her life....and chances are, she is witnessing more than this at home.  I suspect that she probably knows more than we all can imagine about violence, swearing, nudity...get the picture?  I wish there was some allowance in the Welfare and Institutions Code that would allow CPS to act on the behalf of this child, and at least get the parents to do a little PARENTING classes and put themselves in the child's mental and emotional state that THEY as parents have inflicted on their child....I know, most don't believe that CPS is the answer....However, who else will stand up for kids who are abused, neglected, left to fend for themselves and live in unspeakable conditions?  

I have to say you are 100% right on....unfortunately, most of the parents who do these types of things would not be on raising baersfield and staying at home for the best their kids personal and emotional growth.  Nevertheless, well said!      

I know how you feel.  It is hard to watch children in these situations.  Our hearts break for them.  And we feel so scrutinized, we feel like we're under the microscopes of the U.S., China, USCIS - you know what I mean.  And we would never volunteer our children for such suffering so that we could enjoy a movie.

i figure it's selfishness.  i don't think you're going to get any takers on defending why a parent would do that because if someone could own up to their actions, i almost think they'd also own up to being accountable for what their kids watch.

in a similar situation, i offered the bad parent the option of letting me take the child out.  that seemed to do the trick in convicting the parent and they left.

I haven't taken the boys to see any pg-13 or r rated movies at the theatre, but I will confess they have watched a few minutes of one that I didn't realize was so bad.  The tv was turned off as soon as the really bad scene came up and all 4 of us jumped b/c we were scared - that did the trick.  But it's not just the theatre movies, it's also the tv shows, everything is about violence or death or thrill seekers, what happened to the Brady Bunch-type shows?  We have some friends up here on the mountain who own tv's but do not have satellite or cable, they watch rented movies only, I always thought that was weird, but they do spend alot of family time together and there isn't alot of normal household angry moments in their house.

Well, I took my now 8 year old to see Nemo when she was 3, but when the sharks came on we had to leave the theatre because she got freaked out. LOL! So we have to use our disgression even in G rated movies. It just goes to show what some kids have to endure...it is sad that those who are supposed to protect them aren't doing their job.

My husband and myself went to check out Dark Knight to see if it's  appropiate for our children. We came to the conclusion that it would only be appropiate for our 11 year old, not for our 7 and 9 year old. The difference between our parenting and maybe the parenting of others is, we communicate with our children. Communication IS VERY important. We sit, talk to them and explain if they feel uncomfortable in anyway, we will leave; doesn't matter what rating of a movie, or how much we paid. We are consistant on making them understand that they do not copy anything they see on television, in the movies nor on the streets. My children are NOT allowed to see any R rated movie of any kind, have parental controls on our DVR. We try our best. But you'll be surprised on what they show on TV that I will not allow my children to watch. But that's another story.

I will say I did feel like a bad parent at one point when we went to Universal Studios. We went on the Tram and King Kong scared my 7 year old (then 5) to death. I felt sooo bad that when we got off the ride I apologized to her and explained to her that is was ok. I explained King Kong was made for a movie and saying "remember this movie.....see it's just like that.". She felt as ease afterwards and we continued on being more aware. NOBODY is perfect, but it is up to us as parents to use your best judgement on protecting our kids. I will agree with you on that Kevin.

I believe the reason we're seeing this sort of thing is because there's been a general decline in the quality of parenting in our communities.  This hasn't happened overnight, and it's across the board...not just in ethnic or low socioeconomic neighborhoods.

sounds great to me!  Which means somewhere there is someone who will oppose it.

Oh wow, this topic opens up a huge can of worms in so many ways. First, I must say I agree 100% about people not taking their children to inappropriate films. Umm... PG-13 is parent guidance under 13 years of age. It doesn't mean bring kids under 13, it should actually signal that children under 13 probably shouldn't see the film at all. Of course, in my opinion children should only be brought to films that are specifically meant to be children's films. Really, the price of tickets being what they are I would prefer to not have a film ruined by some kid crying, talking, or otherwise creating a disturbance (the $1.00 theater being an exception only to a certain degree). If I'm watching a film like Wall-E, then it is an expectation that kids will be there doing kid things. If I watch Dark Knight there better not be any kids in there as it clearly isn't a film created for children (as an aside I don't think any film Heath Ledger or Christian Bale have been in are appropriate for children).

Secondly, there is the other issue of just plain consideration in a move theater (and society in general). My wife wouldn't accompany me to the theater for a few years because I got fed-up with the rude behavior of others and I would confront them. This includes people talking other than to ask a question regarding something in the film that wasn't a spoiler and/or in a voice louder than a whisper, not turning off their cell phone, or worse actually taking a phone call, or general donkey behavior. I don't have a problem walking over to the offender and whisper a very direct command that they stop the offending behavior. So far I've been lucky in that a potential problem only ensued one time, which was a group of youths all dressed in gang apparel but they ended-up backing down and behaving for the rest of the film. All of the other times the people complied. Of course, this led to my wife not wanting to attend. As I love to date my wife I have learned to bite my tongue and suffer through the misbehavior.

This being said, my son is about to turn two in a few days and I have yet to take him to a theater. The reasons for this are pretty clear for me. I don't really let him watch TV, and I don't like him watching movies. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a prude. Ethan was watching a little bit of Wallace and Grommet earlier today. I just don't like it to be a regular thing. Some parents love their kids to veg-out. Not me. As a result I believe that my son is more interactive and imaginative than he would otherwise be. Well, as this isn't my blog I guess I'll end my rant here. Sorry my post was so long.

Rant away, Noah.  It's a worthy topic.  I'm guessing the people who do take their little ones to movies aren't going to respond to me, or more likely probably are not blog readers to begin with.

davooley's idea is great.  I think it could be done with the right resources, such as suggesting the idea to our local legislatures. I would definitely support it. Maybe Raising Bakersfield could sponsor such a program.

I also agree with davooley's ideas....I think it would go along with the "more you know" programs that are still airing on NBC.  Except with kids being the spokes person.  I love it!  Unfortunately, most people don't want to admit that they are not good parents, even when they allow their children to be physically or sexually abused by their significant others, neglected due to drug abuse, or just mentally and verbally abused.  Even when under the influence, parents continue to insist they can care for their children just fine.  HUH?  I definitely think there has been a serious decline in the parenting responsibilities and quality of parenting since I was a wee one....in the early 70's....and way before I am sure.  The issue is most of the offending parents don't consider parenting as a job.  They think nothing of letting their 5 or 6 year old watch prime time garbage that is meant for adults only, or to use foul language in front of their kids.....then they wonder why the kids repeat and mimick what they have seen and heard....or they just don't see anything wrong with it.  There will always be opposition to changing the social norms; however, I think we can make a fairly good argument that it is time to change the norms and improve society beginning at home!  I'm behind the program, how can we get it started??      

I have established a special discussion group for those of you who support the "parenting education for young people idea".  The url is http://groups.yahoo.com/gro....  Join the group...maybe we can make something happen here in Bakersfield. 

Thought you might be interested in this.  Click on Future Parents of America.

 http://www.changemakers.net...=

What a tremendous amount of feedback for this discussion! It's great to see so many people frustrated with similiar things. We too have experienced parents bringing little children into movies that are unhealthy for them. I do understand the strain parents sometimes feel when freedoms like seeing a simple movie are taken away. However, clearly movies like the Dark Knight or Slasher movies are innappropriate enough for most of us to see that children should not be there. There's always going to be "those" people-- that just don't get it. I don't know what you could do to get it through to them.