http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/pelly/27744 So... all my life, finding friends have been so easy. When you're a kid, your best friend is the one who lives closest to your house. In school, your friends are the ones you meet at class or in activities. In college, you get to meet people who are more like you as they chose that same degree path. All of those people you automatically spend a lot of time with on a weekly or daily basis. Now I'm in this totally new stage of life (3 1/2&nbsp;years already in the making!) where friends aren't so built-in. I actually have to be super intentional about making friends-- which is so weird to me! I am just wondering if other people feel this way or have had similar experiences. How do you find ways to establish friendships, true blue 'doing life&nbsp;together' friendships&nbsp;-- while families and lives provide demands in most corners.&nbsp; I am sure part of it for us is being introverts (INFPs) in a totally new side of the country in addition to this new stage of life. However, it is still a different way! I'd love to hear your thoughts. Throw them out here. So... all my life, finding friends have been so easy. When you're a kid, your best friend is the one who lives closest to your house. In school, your friends are the ones you meet at class or in activities. In college, you get to meet people who are more like you as they chose that same degree path. All of those people you automatically spend a lot of time with on a weekly or daily basis. Now I'm in this totally new stage of life (3 1/2&nbsp;years already in the making!) where friends aren't so built-in. I actually have to be super intentional about making friends-- which is so weird to me! I am just wondering if other people feel this way or have had similar experiences. How do you find ways to establish friendships, true blue 'doing life&nbsp;together' friendships&nbsp;-- while families and lives provide demands in most corners.&nbsp; I am sure part of it for us is being introverts (INFPs) in a totally new side of the country in addition to this new stage of life. However, it is still a different way! I'd love to hear your thoughts. Throw them out here. en-us 35.348422 -119.064343 <p>yup, that's the status of things!! i had to be more proactive than i ever have in my life to meet new friends.  i've met a lot of phenomenal women through the meetup.com.  here's a link to the local bakersfield SAHM group: <a href="http://sahm.meetup.com/1308/">http://sahm.meetup.com/1308/</a></p> <p>at first i was in it to meet other moms with boys my son's age.  then, i got even more proactive and started going to the mom's night outs and have met wonderful women who i wouldn't have met through play dates alone.</p> <p>as for LIFE friends.  that's tough when you have kids.  people move, alot.  but, when i was younger, i changed friends a lot.  like you said, the group at school, or the neighborhood.  it all changes when there's a change. </p> <p>Also, i've met fantastic friends at church.  some are in their early twenties, some are in their sixties.  that's what i love about it. </p> http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/pelly/27744/#c_248792 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/pelly/27744/#c_248792 <p>yup, that's the status of things!! i had to be more proactive than i ever have in my life to meet new friends.  i've met a lot of phenomenal women through the meetup.com.  here's a link to the local bakersfield SAHM group: <a href="http://sahm.meetup.com/1308/">http://sahm.meetup.com/1308/</a></p> <p>at first i was in it to meet other moms with boys my son's age.  then, i got even more proactive and started going to the mom's night outs and have met wonderful women who i wouldn't have met through play dates alone.</p> <p>as for LIFE friends.  that's tough when you have kids.  people move, alot.  but, when i was younger, i changed friends a lot.  like you said, the group at school, or the neighborhood.  it all changes when there's a change. </p> <p>Also, i've met fantastic friends at church.  some are in their early twenties, some are in their sixties.  that's what i love about it. </p> <p><span style="color: #800080">Well, for me....I am an extrovert and LOVE&nbsp;to&nbsp;talk!&nbsp; Becoming a stay at home mom was really hard for me.&nbsp; I&nbsp;stayed at&nbsp; home for the first 9 months or so, staring at the walls and playing with the kiddo,&nbsp;watching&nbsp;cartoons.&nbsp; Well, I started attending a MOPS group (Mother's of Preschoolers) and&nbsp;have made some amazing-life-long friends Who have stuck with me through the good and bad.&nbsp; Also, getting involved in a church setting, bible study for moms...just started one today, a Beth Moore study and it is awesome!&nbsp; My sister-in-law got me to go to the study this morning....it's amazing that I was&nbsp;instantly comfortable and loved the video of Beth Moore talking.&nbsp;&nbsp;This is my first time with Beth Moore and the study....should be really a GREAT experience!&nbsp;&nbsp;</span></p> <p>Back to making friends,&nbsp;there are many MOPS groups in Bakersfield - they are amazing for anyone, intro or extroverted....and you should be able to find one that fits your needs.&nbsp;&nbsp;I noticed that Olive Knolls has an ad on the&nbsp;raising bakersfield site...but, you can also go to MOPS.org and find one near you.&nbsp; Meetup&nbsp;groups are also good; I got&nbsp;too&nbsp;busy with Kindergarten and Preschool schedules to juggle it all....keep us&nbsp;posted!&nbsp;</p> http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/pelly/27744/#c_248834 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/pelly/27744/#c_248834 <p><span style="color: #800080">Well, for me....I am an extrovert and LOVE&nbsp;to&nbsp;talk!&nbsp; Becoming a stay at home mom was really hard for me.&nbsp; I&nbsp;stayed at&nbsp; home for the first 9 months or so, staring at the walls and playing with the kiddo,&nbsp;watching&nbsp;cartoons.&nbsp; Well, I started attending a MOPS group (Mother's of Preschoolers) and&nbsp;have made some amazing-life-long friends Who have stuck with me through the good and bad.&nbsp; Also, getting involved in a church setting, bible study for moms...just started one today, a Beth Moore study and it is awesome!&nbsp; My sister-in-law got me to go to the study this morning....it's amazing that I was&nbsp;instantly comfortable and loved the video of Beth Moore talking.&nbsp;&nbsp;This is my first time with Beth Moore and the study....should be really a GREAT experience!&nbsp;&nbsp;</span></p> <p>Back to making friends,&nbsp;there are many MOPS groups in Bakersfield - they are amazing for anyone, intro or extroverted....and you should be able to find one that fits your needs.&nbsp;&nbsp;I noticed that Olive Knolls has an ad on the&nbsp;raising bakersfield site...but, you can also go to MOPS.org and find one near you.&nbsp; Meetup&nbsp;groups are also good; I got&nbsp;too&nbsp;busy with Kindergarten and Preschool schedules to juggle it all....keep us&nbsp;posted!&nbsp;</p> <p>I think since getting pregnant it's been like a way to reconnect for me with some friends that I haven't had much in common with in the last few years. In particular it's been great to hang out again with one of my girlfriends that was a bridesmaid in my wedding. She got married shortly after I did and started having kids right away. So while she was off at playgroups and hanging out in the nursery at church I kinda missed out on the last four years of her life. Now that I'm pregnant she's giving me all this advice, I've been hanging out with her and she's giving me a bunch of great hand-me-down clothes.</p> <p>I'm also looking forward to meeting some new friends at a playgroup that is starting up for our neighborhood. I probably never would have been confident enough (ISFJ here) to hang out with a bunch of my neighbors, but now with a kid on the way I actually have an excuse!&nbsp;</p> http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/pelly/27744/#c_249507 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/pelly/27744/#c_249507 <p>I think since getting pregnant it's been like a way to reconnect for me with some friends that I haven't had much in common with in the last few years. In particular it's been great to hang out again with one of my girlfriends that was a bridesmaid in my wedding. She got married shortly after I did and started having kids right away. So while she was off at playgroups and hanging out in the nursery at church I kinda missed out on the last four years of her life. Now that I'm pregnant she's giving me all this advice, I've been hanging out with her and she's giving me a bunch of great hand-me-down clothes.</p> <p>I'm also looking forward to meeting some new friends at a playgroup that is starting up for our neighborhood. I probably never would have been confident enough (ISFJ here) to hang out with a bunch of my neighbors, but now with a kid on the way I actually have an excuse!&nbsp;</p>