Blog Mama - twogirlsmama's Blog - Raising Bakersfield http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama Musings on Motherhood Musings on Motherhood en-us A Mother's Instinct http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/30457 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/30457 <p>The girls and I went out around 7 tonight to enjoy the late evening breeze. My youngest was running through the sprinklers, but when her sister went to turn the water down, a mama bird came flying out of our Camilla bushes. Every time my oldest&nbsp; went near the faucet after that you could hear the mama bird protest. I figured she must have a nest nearby. A little while later, the mama got really upset and I saw a baby bird fluttering around on our porch, followed by my cat who had up to that point been lazing on our doormat. I quickly put the cat inside the house, then went to look for the baby. The mother was flying from her bush to the tree next to our porch, calling for her baby. I found him behind one of my big flower pots, and moved it out of the way so the mama could see him. We stood back on the grass and watched to see if she would come to his rescue, but I soon realized she was trying to scare us off. So we went into the house and watched for awhile through the panes of our French door. </p> <p>I kept hearing the mama call to the baby, and finally the baby answered her and started to make his way back toward the safety of another nearby bush. All the while the mother circled the area and kept a close watch. My guess is the baby is learning to fly, but hasn't quite mastered it yet. And even though that mama is trying to teach her baby a little independence, she still has her eye on him. Just like any good mother. I remember wondering when my girls were babies, how I would ever let them out of the nest, out of my sight. But gradually, I was able to let them fly, a little at a time, but always beneath my watchful gaze. It is our God- given instinct to protect our babies with our very lives, and it was no different for this mama bird than it is for us. This evening we got a lesson in nature none of us will soon forget.</p>


Title: Mama Bird, etc. July 2008 013.jpg
Caption: Mama Bird
Credit: twogirlsmama


Title: Mama Bird, etc. July 2008 013.jpg
Caption: Mama Bird
Credit: twogirlsmama


Title: Mama Bird, etc. July 2008 021.jpg
Caption: Watching
Credit: twogirlsmama


Title: Mama Bird, etc. July 2008 021.jpg
Caption: Watching
Credit: twogirlsmama

 Mama Bird, etc. July 2008 013.jpg Mama Bird twogirlsmama Mama Bird, etc. July 2008 021.jpg Watching twogirlsmama NEVER Leave A 3-year-old Un-Attended...with Ice Cream!! http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/30251 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/30251 <p>My 8 year old tried to tell me, but I was busy writing an e-mail. Those few extra minutes ended up costing me a lot more time in clean up. Needless to say, my 3 year old went straight into the bath tub while I hosed down the kitchen. I suppose it could have been worse...at least it was ice cream and not another brown substance she chose to fingerpaint with...although she did have a fascination with painting with THAT a few times, a couple years back. Ah the joys of toddler-hood!</p>


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Caption: My kitchen table
Credit: twogirlsmama


Title: chocolatetable.jpg
Caption: My kitchen table
Credit: twogirlsmama


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Caption: Chocolate Monster
Credit: twogirlsmama


Title: chocolatemonster.jpg.jpg
Caption: Chocolate Monster
Credit: twogirlsmama

 chocolatetable.jpg My kitchen table twogirlsmama chocolatemonster.jpg.jpg Chocolate Monster twogirlsmama Baby Jones http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/30250 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/30250 <p>Maybe it's because several of my (younger) friends are turning up pregnant. Or maybe it's because I know I am finished, done, kaput, in the birthing department. Whatever the case, I have been having major baby longings lately. I suppose it's inevitable. My almost 4 year old is growing out of babyhood. In fact, she reminds me daily that she's a 'big girl' and seems to have given up naps completely. </p> <p>So when I see the rolly polly legs of babies and the tiny clothes in stores that no longer fit anyone at my house, I start itching for another one. Then I remind myself, that both of my girls are fully trained; they feed themselves, use the toilet, even brush their own teeth. Why oh why would I go back to the days of sleep deprivation and having someone whose every need depends on me. Well, it's the toothless grin and the soft skin and the sweet smell, and well, even that dependence. My girls are self-sufficient, and it's GREAT, but part of me misses that little person who needed me so much. I know it will pass and that ultimately I am in a good place, to continue my education, start looking toward a career, but I guess even at nearly 40, that baby yearning can still rear it's head. Luckily my friends will soon have lots of babies for me to cuddle,...and I can return them when they start to fuss!</p> Too DARN Hot!! http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/29778 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/29778 <p>It's been awhile since I've sat down to write. I was out of town for most of one week and my Dad had surgery which threw off last week, plus the holiday. But lately it's been hard to blog because my house is soooo hot during the day. Needless to say a swamp cooler doesn't work once it's over 90...and 108? FORGET IT! So, we divide our time between Barnes and Noble or other well cooled places. And, as I have every year since birth (minus the 2 summers I spent living elsewhere) I curse my hometown and wish I could relocate. I was thinking today, come Fall, I will forget my disgust for the month of July, just like I do every October. This is my home, where I grew up, where the bulk of 'my people' live, so it would be hard to leave. But relocating for the summer, if I had the means to do so, would definitely make the other 9 months more enjoyable!!</p> Role Reversal...Worrying about my Dad http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/29373 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/29373 <p>My Dad had surgery today. It wasn't an emergency or anything. He has been planning/dreading it for about a month, but it was still scary. Scary because he has always been around, and things like surgery and hospital stays make you start thinking about people who aren't around. I cannot imagine not having either of my parents in my life. I know that day may come, but I am by no means ready for it. </p> <p>Anyway, he came through the first operation fine, but is in a lot of pain and will have to have a second surgery on Thursday. The good news is, he is very healthy and this is a corrective surgery that will hopefully help with some pain and problems he's been having in his arm. But to see this strong man, the one who has always taken care of me, in need of care himself, is humbling and not a little bit frightening. I know God is in control and I am thankful for all the prayers I know where surrounding him today. I guess it is yet another reminder to me how precious life is, and that it is those we love who make it so valuable.</p> Devouring Books http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28815 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28815 <p>My 8 year old is turning into quite the bookworm and it makes me so happy. Not only am I her Mom, I am an avid reader and lover of literature...and yet I felt I had failed her on some level because I didn't push her to read very early. I let her go at her own pace, which isn't a bad thing, but I also didn't help her enough in the beginning and so she kind of lost momentum...until 2nd grade when her wonderful teacher&nbsp; brought her up to speed. </p> <p>Anyway, my goal for the summer was to get her to read, read, read. As a former library employee, I have always enrolled her, and now her sister, into their summer reading program, but this is the first year she is really reading on her own, and even motivating herself to do it.&nbsp; It does my heart good. She started a couple weeks ago and is already half way through the 10 books that are required. I don't think there's a better way for a kid to spend the afternoon,..okay, well, maybe there is, but reading is definitely on the top 10 list...</p> My Dad is a legend in my mind... http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28614 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28614 <p>I didn't forget Dad, I just got preoccupied, as I so often do in the midst of raising kids, and forgot to post this on Sunday when I should have...but better late than never, right?</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 0in;">My Dad is an icon. His family came to California from Oklahoma during the Dust Bowl and they lived near Weed Patch Camp for several years in true Steinbeck-ian style. He picked cotton and other crops to help contribute to his family's income and was the first of his siblings to finish High School and the only one to graduate college. He graduated from Arvin High School and later went back to work at the Probation Department in the town where he'd been raised. He served in the Air Force during the Korean war, and later in the Naval Reserves, and even got a Master's Degree, all while providing for his family.</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 0in;">I was thinking about him the other day, because I just started back to school again myself, and I was wondering how he found the time to work 40+ hours a week and still do his homework. I guess he has my Mom to thank a little bit for that. She held down the fort while he was away, but still, that was a lot for him to take on. But that's just how he is--a hard worker. He has always been a role model for me. Intelligent and wise. Gentle and kind. He has an integrity sadly lacking from a lot of men these days. My younger sister and I joke that he set the bar too high and that's why we can't find men who measure up. Although he pretends to be anti-social, whenever people show up at the house he will talk their ear off telling all his wonderful stories. I told him recently that I want to make a video of him talking about his life, because I don't want to lose the rich oral history he has to pass down. Even though I've heard some of the stories a hundred times, I'm afraid I'll forget them or re-tell them wrong.</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 0in;">Anyway, needless to say I am proud of him and so blessed to have him as my Dad and my friend. Happy Father's Day, Dad, a couple days late.</p>


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Caption: My Dad with me and my older sister circa 1970
Credit: twogirlsmama


Title: dadwithgirls.jpg
Caption: My Dad with me and my older sister circa 1970
Credit: twogirlsmama

 dadwithgirls.jpg My Dad with me and my older sister circa 1970 twogirlsmama Earth Mama Wannabe http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28539 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28539 <p>&nbsp;</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 0in;">There is this idealistic part of me that wants to be an earth mother, living on a big piece of land with 10 kids. Unfortunately the logistics just never lined up. Rocky marriage, lack of patience for the two kids I <i>do</i> have, and of course, the land. Anyway, I try to be content within my current circumstances, but most days I feel like I'm still trying to decide what I want to be when I grow up. Mom is my favorite job to date, and the only one I really want to do full time, but unfortunately the currency in which I'm paid isn't accepted at most stores. Although whoever said your good looks won't get you anything never met my girls. Their cuteness has gotten them free stuff on more than one occasion. My point here,...I'm not sure. Other than, life is what we make of it and idealism and reality have to meet somewhere in the middle. Most of all I try to enjoy the ride, savor it, because I know it will go by in the blink of an eye...</p> Flashback to Childhood Summers http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28173 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28173 <p>Remember when you were a kid and you ran around barefoot and the hot sidewalk would burn your feet? Well, nothing has changed. Today, as the ice cream man was coming down our street, I told the girls to go in and get their shoes on before going out to the truck, but didn't take my own advice. I ran across the black asphalt of the street and nearly lost a layer of skin from the bottom of my feet. Apparently my sense memory had forgotten after 30 years what it's like to do that. I don't recommend it. The ice cream man took mercy on me and threw down a piece of cardboard for me to stand on. Still, he must have gotten a good laugh at the crazy Mom dumb enough to cross a street barefoot during a Bakersfield summer. And of course my girls and their friend got a chuckle out of watching me run for my life, or at least, the life of my feet!</p> Not Ready for an Empty Nest http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28110 http://www.raisingbakersfield.com/home/Blog/twogirlsmama/28110 <p>Let me preface this blog by saying there are all kinds of parenting styles, just like there are all kinds of personalities, and everyone has a style that works best&nbsp; for them. That being said, my style is, apparently, attachment parenting. I didn't know that was what my style was called, until my oldest daughter was about 2 and I was reading about weaning and there was a link in the article on that word, so I clicked on it and read the definition. Basically, it's parents who wear (in a sling) or carry their kids a lot, co-sleep, and often times breast feed longer than the average bear.</p> <p>So, fast forward 8 years and I am still having separation issues. Yes, me, not my daughter. She is happy and well-adjusted and even made the jump from home schooling to public school this year with no fuss and loads of success. I'm the one who can't sleep nights worrying about possible scenarios she may encounter without me in her shadow. And as if sending her off to school wasn't bad enough, I now have to send her to her Dad's house once a week. Once a week, not bad odds, considering there are 6 other nights she and her sister spend with me. But oh that one night! Don't get me wrong, they love going and it's important to me that they have a relationship with their Dad. But must they sleep there too?</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 0in;">Sure, I enjoy the break for the first few hours. Catch up on housework, run an errand without the help of children, maybe even read a book! But it's bedtime that gets me. No matter how late I stay up and how long I avoid going to bed, I always have a hard time getting to sleep. It is too eerily quiet. And my bed is just too empty. Yes, it's true, my 3 year old still sleeps with me. In the interest of fairness, her sister slept with me til she was almost 4, so...</p> <p style="margin-bottom: 0in;">Anyway, I have adapted, as much as I can, to my prematurely empty nest, and it is only temporary, for now, at least. But I can see myself in 10 years when my oldest heads off to college. Can I come with you, I'll ask. <b><i>Mom</i></b>, she'll most likely say, PUHLEASE! Give me some SPACE! And that's all well and good. It's healthy for them to spread their little wings and jump ship at some point. I just hate all these little departures, when I am trying so desparately to soak up every moment with them while I can. I hear that a lot more kids are moving back home after they graduate college these days. I am secretly hoping the trend continues. But more than likely my girls will be saying to me, &quot;No Mom, you can't live with us. Go, be an adult.&quot; But that is so over rated!</p>